I was greeted from behind by Summer and my mom when we arrived at the airport. I knew she was going to try to scare me because my mom told me and she still got me. She jumped into my arms and gave me lots of hugs. She was very bubbly and it made a long day of flying much better. I carried her in my arms as we went to pick up the bags. She was not ready for me to put her down when we got there, but I gave her the task of helping her daddy with the bags so she happily ran off with him. I talked to my mom and it sounded like she was a very busy girl while I was gone although she was anxious for my arrival home.
She opted out of the church water balloon activity they had for the kids Wednesday night. My mom said she didn't want any part of it once she saw what they were doing. Most of the kids are much bigger than her so I can understand why she would be intimidated. She's in preschool, and I think the kids range up to 5th or 6th grade. Somehow she always manages to stay right by Memaw's side whenever she takes her to church. But, I can't blame her. My mom does rock. She took off work yesterday to take Summer hiking on Raccoon Mountain and spend the day with her so Nanny could go back to work. Summer enjoyed the hike and was proud that she could walk for so long.
Her picture was still hanging at the Taste of Hamilton Place, and she was still part of the 3 words video. She saw Dr. Gratias and Miss Ashley as well as a few of the nurses from the clinic. My mom said she wore her "This girl rocks" shirt and Dr. G was quick to agree. She also ran into some of her cancer buddies and other people she knew. I'm sure it did not take much for her to sway Memaw and Nanny to take her to the playground after they enjoyed some of the food. She has a way with them. I guess she really has a way with everyone though.
Lately, I think she has been trying to manipulate me into not taking her to school. Either that or she just really doesn't know how much it upsets me when she weeps and clings to me when we part at her classroom door. Last night as we were getting ready for bed, she went on and on about how she doesn't like it and that it is not fun. She definitley expressed to me that she doesn't think her life will be lacking if she doesn't go back, but said nothing about being away from me being the reason this time. Whenever we pick her up, she seems like she had a perfectly fine time. I guess there is a little of an attachment issue that was formed when she was diagnosed with cancer. Maybe it was there before then though. Anyhow, it is not fun to hear these things come out of her mouth, but I know it is good for her to go and learn as well as socialize with other kids. Really, I think I am still trying to convince myself though. Is home-preschooling really so bad? We have the workbooks. We have several classes/activites a week and also regular playdates with a variety of friends. Just wait, I'll have myself talked into homeschooling when kindergarten comes around. LOL Well, hopefully not. I would really prefer for her to get the best education in the most stimulating environment there available. But, these drama filled drop-offs are going to have to come to an end.
I almost dropped her off at the door today. When I pulled in the car port, after waiting for several other cars to drop their kids off, she begged me please not to drop her off there. I told her she had to agree not to cry or she will be dropped off there next time. She agreed. Well, today was her lucky day. Or mine, I'm not sure. When we got to the classroom, the lights were off and there was no one in sight. That's when I found out there was a field trip today. I had originally thought it was not until Thursday, but with her missing last Thursday I didn't get the reminder memo. Oops! Lucky for us both, who were neither one ready to be apart from each other, we got to remain together and headed back to the car. We followed the teacher to the apple orchard which was almost an hour away. I know Summer has never seen so many apples in her life. When we were on the hay ride, I asked her how many she thought there were. She said, "80." Not quite. I told her maybe 80 million, and she just agreed. The kids got to see how they sort the apples (by hand) and get them clean and shiny. They also learned that they use automatic hand pickers to harvest the fruit - hands. There was a huge refrigerator where they stored the apples and cider ready to be shipped to local grocers that the kids got to explore. The story of Johnny Appleseed was told as the kids sat around on a big rug. It was the perfect first field trip even though it was unexpected. The sun was a little warm at times, but there were blessed moments where the shade made everything okay again. I didn't have my camera which was disappointing, but one of the kids moms captured her after she and Emma begged a little boy to sit between them. The only thing that put a damper on the morning was the fact that I thought my car was leaking gas because the fuel gauge decided to stop working. After stopping for gas twice and hearing me make numerous phone calls to her daddy, Summer was very concerned with what was going on. But, I'm pretty sure it was just the gauge after finding out from someone else at the gas station that it was just my A/C dripping and not gas. So, her fears and mine were put to rest as we headed to trade out cars.
Summer rode her bike today. She braved the hill in front of our building while I rode beside her on my bike. She was a little worried that she wouldn't be able to make it up. She still uses the training wills a lot and you could here them scuffing against the ground as she teetered back and forth. She got really excited when she would start going "fast" (in her eyes anyway). After one trip down the bridge and back, she became the leader and had to turn to make sure I was keeping up with her. LOL One time she turned a little too hard and crashed, but thankfully, her knee pads kept her from getting scuffed when she landed on them. She actually did a great job managing the fall and got back on and pedaled away. She was still not confident in her ability to come back down the hill in front of our building, but she managed to do it with a little help from me.
Bedtime came early tonight unlike last night when she couldn't get enough of me or me playing with her. I even agreed to play Hannah Montana last night which was big for me and she knew it. I have never hid my dislike for that game. We skipped games tonight and opted for books. Tonight, she picked out "Go, Dog, Go," "Piggy goes to the doctor," and "The Berenstein Bears Go to the doctor." You would think she still went to the doctor a lot the way she still likes books about going there. I guess they are very real to her though. I doubt she is ever excited when we actually do go to the doctor, but these books are something she can directly relate to. I'm so glad to be celebrating another Childhood Cancer Awareness month, but this time with a much more healthy little girl. I just love tucking her in at night and hope for thousands more of these nights to come. You never know when it could be your child who is taken away in the night to sing with the angels. My life experience has led me to believe that it is important to give them all the love you can today and everyday. I thank god for my little angel on Earth and every day that I get to spend with her.
5 years ago
3 comments:
So glad that you got to spend the day with Summer on the field trip. Enjoy all the time that she is clinging to you. They grow up so fast and then it is hard to even get a hug.
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Homeschooling preschool is actually pretty darn cool...
But that's my opinion.
Hope the transition becomes easier for you both.
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